Thursday, September 19, 2013

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Holiday

I did MDMA. I remember the young girls when I was a teenager.

I was too shy to dance, too interested to go home.

Now I feel my age--on the cheek of the theory of the man-child, a tear rolls down, going nowhere.

 

A dead silence. A white hole occupies the center of my life.

Rays of sunlight whirling around on the stairs.

The sun is asleep; the afternoon is invariable.

Metallic reflections in the sand.

 

A stir in the moist and not very mobile air,

I can hear female insects crossing paths.

I want to kill myself, join a sect ;

I want to make a move, but it would be useless.

 

In 5 hours at the latest the sky will be all black ;

I'll wait for morning crushing flies on my computer keyboard.

Darkness simmers like a million little mouths ;

And morning returns, white and dry, without hope.

My body is like a bag full of red wires
It's dark in my room, the glow from my eye is faint
I'm affraid of getting up, deep down in me I feel
Something soft and evil, start to move

I hate this meat
Covering my bones. A layer of fat
Sensitive to pain, spongious ;
At the bottom, an organ that gets hard.

I hate u, Jesus, for giving me this body
Friendships disintegrate, everything fades gently, things go faster and faster,
Years pass and glide by and nothing resurrects,
I have no desire to live and I am affraid of death.

Thursday, September 5, 2013