Thursday, December 8, 2011

Guest post by Mark Weikel: How to Flirt at Holiday Parties

The holidays are upon us and along with merry activities such as decking the halls, singing carols, and emailing your extensive wish-list to Santa (after all, you’ve been extra good this year) comes the slew of events that have filled up your December calendar.

So if you’re single, RSVP-ed, and plan on doing a little festive flirting at a holiday art opening or lavish Christmas gala, it’s crucial that you know how it’s done. To have a blast at your holiday event and ensure that you aren’t left under the mistletoe knocking back eggnog all by yourself, check out the following tips for how to flirt:

Tip #1: Be realistic. If you embark upon your flirting adventures with the expectation that you are going to get a relationship out it, you could be setting yourself up for failure. Look at flirting as a way to have fun and meet new people…and who knows, maybe a flirtatious spark could lead to something more.

Tip #2: Be approachable. When it comes to flirting, we all get nervous putting ourselves out there. Even with butterflies, however, it is important to try your best to relax so that you come across as welcoming to prospects at the party. Think about it like this: Who would you rather approach? Someone who is smiling, laughing and having a good time? Or someone giving off unfriendly vibes and not socializing with anyone? Most likely you’d choose the former.

Tip #3: Keep your eye on the prize. As simple as it seems, making eyes at someone with whom you wouldn’t mind getting to know better can be a great way to lure them in. Studies indicate that you have to look at a person three times before they will approach you. Now, be careful not to be creepy when doing this…to let them know you are interested, try to lock eyes for just a few seconds then look away. If you look again and they are gazing your way, it’s a good sign.

Tip #4: Strike up conversation. Should you be scanning the room at the holiday event and notice a beautiful stranger admiring a beautiful piece of art, use it as an opportunity to swoop in and make your introduction. When you break the ice with harmless topics and common ground such as a painting or a sculpture at the party (your approach will depend on where you are), it can ease you into a dialogue so that you can possibly build a deeper conversation from there.

Tip #5: Read body language. Don’t let the hot toddies get the best of you—be alert and stay aware of your surroundings so that you can pick up on body language cues from eligible singles at your holiday event. Is someone exchanging looks with you? Are they flirting back with their eyes? Is their body or feet turned in your direction?

Tip #6: Listen up! As important as it is to talk to your new holiday friend, in order for the two of you to really hit it off, it is equally as important for you to actively listen. With whoever you’re flirting, let them know you’re interested by giving them your full attention and not getting distracted by what’s going on around you.

Tip #7: Go for the gold. If you find that the person you’ve been flirting with at your holiday event is someone you’d like to explore a flirtatious bond with further, don’t be afraid to let them know! Seal the deal by asking for their number or email address and if possible, see about arranging a date.

Mark Weikel is a guest post author who enjoys writing on topics surrounding dating and relationships. In addition, Mark also contributes his work to a gay dating site where he offers advice for safe online connections in the gay community.

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